Ebony and Ivory....It's official!
I have some news I was so excited to share with you over two weeks ago, June 29th (my golden birthday) to be precise. No, I wasn't going to write a blog in honor of my birthday (turning 29 wasn't that exciting, even if it did take place on the 29th). So, if this "news" was so exciting two weeks ago, why didn't I write the blog then? Well, I also excited and ready to write it on June 29th, when I figured I should wait just a couple of days before sending it out into the vast phantom world of the blog. And as things happen, a couple of days just turned into a couple a weeks, but not for waning excitement or loss of news. So, the news that really is no longer news and really never was news in the sense of an unexpected event, is... that I am now OFFICIALLY engaged!! I know it's all a matter of technicality and that we were for all practical purposes engaged already, but now it's official.
Kodjo, who had asked my parents for their blessing a few weeks earlier, called me the morning of June 29th (at 5:40 am to make sure he wouldn't miss me because he knew I had to leave for work early... although not quite that early!) to "humbly ask for my hand in marriage". It was very cute! Unfortunately the phone card he had bought ended up being good for only 2 minutes (he was expecting 8 minutes but it was more expensive to call from Togo than from Benin, where he bought the card), so he had to make it quick! In case you think proposing over the phone is an easy proposal requiring no skill or ingenuity, listen to this little story (makes the 2 minute proposal story a bit longer as well): Kodjo wanted to officially propose on June 29th because it was my golden birthday and he knew it would be a special birthday gift. However, he was going to be home in Togo where his phone doesn't get any reception in Togo. Therefore, he had borrowed the only other cell phone in the village, which unfortunately (maybe to his dismay and utter hopelessness!) had no battery charge left. That may not be a big deal in your mind, but in a village without electricity, a cell phone without a charge is just as useless as a cell phone that gets no reception which is just as useful as having no phone at all. Fortunately, my soon-to-be husband (he, he, he, sounds kind of funny to use the word "husband". Me, I'll have a husband??) is smart and figured out that he could transfer the SIM card from the borrowed phone into his phone. And it worked!!! Like I said, smart man. And I was able to get the birthday gift I was hoping for! (Confession: My real birthday wish had been to have Kodjo here on my golden birthday, but this was an acceptable compensation for the loss of that dream!)
So, there you have the news that really is no longer news and really never was news because we all knew it was coming. Doesn't change the fact that still I'm excited!
Engagement Q & A
People usually ask these questions of newly engaged couples and you may be wondering them about us:
When will the wedding be?
Don't know. Sorry.
Ok, ok, I won't leave it quite at that. Getting married for us is dependent on him getting a visa to the US, because at this point we would like to get married here. However, because we really don't know how long it will be before he gets a visa, we really can't plan a wedding date. Looking at other people's situations and from what an immigration specialist told me, it seems like 6 months is a rough positive estimate. However, it could take longer, 8 months, 10 months, or more. The immigration specialist once saw a case that took 1 1/2 years!! He did say that it was a very complicated situation and wouldn't really expect that for us. God, please no! Then, after he gets a visa, we have 90 days to get married (although we could get married later than that if we at least have a civil wedding during the allotted time... at this point, we're thinking just to get completely married within that time frame. Of course that could change depending on when he comes, school breaks, etc. Need a little help putting all this together? Since we applied the middle of June, probably the earliest he would come is as a Christmas present, which would put 3 months from there sometime in March. However, it could very likely be later than that... and a summer wedding always seemed nice to me (probably due to the fact that I've been on a school calendar for almost 25 years of my life!)
Where will the wedding be?
Chicago. At least that's the plan.
When will you see your fiance (he, he, he I have a fiance!!) next?
Ok, that is not a typical question people generally ask newly engaged couples, but let's face it, we aren't a typical couple. I'll use it as my replacement question for "What's the engagement ring like?"
I really am not sure when I'll see Kodjo next. It was 6 months this last week and that is already way too much time. The 6 month marker was a very difficult one to cross and the thought of it being 6 more months (remember the rough POSITIVE estimate would bring him here as a Christmas present) is not a fun one to think about. I had really hoped to be able to meet up in Austria this summer, but that is sadly not working out. Depending on what job I decide to take for the fall (that'll have to wait for another blog and probably will just wait until I've actually decided), I'd really like for us to meet up in Vienna in September. However, that is at this point still only a dream.
If you have other questions, just ask and you too may make it into my blog! For today's honorable mention, I'd like to mention Ken Kaczmarek, who contributed the title "ebony and ivory". Thank you! It sounds much more refined than my last title of "Salt 'N' Peppa". Speaking of salt and pepper, I have to do a second unplanned honorable mention: my friend Laura Michel gave me a salt and pepper shaker set. They're little people that hug, one black and one white. Right now they're on my kitchen counter, a foot apart, their arms stretched out reaching for the other (Awwww!). Ok, now that I'm on a roll of honorable contributors to this black and white thing Kodjo and I seem to have going on, my mom sent me a clipping from the Romania TV guide. The caption says, "As you can see from the picture, in the dog world, interracial conflict doesn't exist." The photograph is of a black dog and a white dog, standing on their hind legs, arm in arm. I could go on with several other humorous things people have given me, but I'll stop for now.
Salt N Peppa now
Salt N Peppa soon
I look forward to the day I can give you some real news, such as "he's got the visa!!!" But I'll try to write again before that :)
Kodjo, who had asked my parents for their blessing a few weeks earlier, called me the morning of June 29th (at 5:40 am to make sure he wouldn't miss me because he knew I had to leave for work early... although not quite that early!) to "humbly ask for my hand in marriage". It was very cute! Unfortunately the phone card he had bought ended up being good for only 2 minutes (he was expecting 8 minutes but it was more expensive to call from Togo than from Benin, where he bought the card), so he had to make it quick! In case you think proposing over the phone is an easy proposal requiring no skill or ingenuity, listen to this little story (makes the 2 minute proposal story a bit longer as well): Kodjo wanted to officially propose on June 29th because it was my golden birthday and he knew it would be a special birthday gift. However, he was going to be home in Togo where his phone doesn't get any reception in Togo. Therefore, he had borrowed the only other cell phone in the village, which unfortunately (maybe to his dismay and utter hopelessness!) had no battery charge left. That may not be a big deal in your mind, but in a village without electricity, a cell phone without a charge is just as useless as a cell phone that gets no reception which is just as useful as having no phone at all. Fortunately, my soon-to-be husband (he, he, he, sounds kind of funny to use the word "husband". Me, I'll have a husband??) is smart and figured out that he could transfer the SIM card from the borrowed phone into his phone. And it worked!!! Like I said, smart man. And I was able to get the birthday gift I was hoping for! (Confession: My real birthday wish had been to have Kodjo here on my golden birthday, but this was an acceptable compensation for the loss of that dream!)
So, there you have the news that really is no longer news and really never was news because we all knew it was coming. Doesn't change the fact that still I'm excited!
Engagement Q & A
People usually ask these questions of newly engaged couples and you may be wondering them about us:
When will the wedding be?
Don't know. Sorry.
Ok, ok, I won't leave it quite at that. Getting married for us is dependent on him getting a visa to the US, because at this point we would like to get married here. However, because we really don't know how long it will be before he gets a visa, we really can't plan a wedding date. Looking at other people's situations and from what an immigration specialist told me, it seems like 6 months is a rough positive estimate. However, it could take longer, 8 months, 10 months, or more. The immigration specialist once saw a case that took 1 1/2 years!! He did say that it was a very complicated situation and wouldn't really expect that for us. God, please no! Then, after he gets a visa, we have 90 days to get married (although we could get married later than that if we at least have a civil wedding during the allotted time... at this point, we're thinking just to get completely married within that time frame. Of course that could change depending on when he comes, school breaks, etc. Need a little help putting all this together? Since we applied the middle of June, probably the earliest he would come is as a Christmas present, which would put 3 months from there sometime in March. However, it could very likely be later than that... and a summer wedding always seemed nice to me (probably due to the fact that I've been on a school calendar for almost 25 years of my life!)
Where will the wedding be?
Chicago. At least that's the plan.
When will you see your fiance (he, he, he I have a fiance!!) next?
Ok, that is not a typical question people generally ask newly engaged couples, but let's face it, we aren't a typical couple. I'll use it as my replacement question for "What's the engagement ring like?"
I really am not sure when I'll see Kodjo next. It was 6 months this last week and that is already way too much time. The 6 month marker was a very difficult one to cross and the thought of it being 6 more months (remember the rough POSITIVE estimate would bring him here as a Christmas present) is not a fun one to think about. I had really hoped to be able to meet up in Austria this summer, but that is sadly not working out. Depending on what job I decide to take for the fall (that'll have to wait for another blog and probably will just wait until I've actually decided), I'd really like for us to meet up in Vienna in September. However, that is at this point still only a dream.
If you have other questions, just ask and you too may make it into my blog! For today's honorable mention, I'd like to mention Ken Kaczmarek, who contributed the title "ebony and ivory". Thank you! It sounds much more refined than my last title of "Salt 'N' Peppa". Speaking of salt and pepper, I have to do a second unplanned honorable mention: my friend Laura Michel gave me a salt and pepper shaker set. They're little people that hug, one black and one white. Right now they're on my kitchen counter, a foot apart, their arms stretched out reaching for the other (Awwww!). Ok, now that I'm on a roll of honorable contributors to this black and white thing Kodjo and I seem to have going on, my mom sent me a clipping from the Romania TV guide. The caption says, "As you can see from the picture, in the dog world, interracial conflict doesn't exist." The photograph is of a black dog and a white dog, standing on their hind legs, arm in arm. I could go on with several other humorous things people have given me, but I'll stop for now.
Salt N Peppa now
Salt N Peppa soonI look forward to the day I can give you some real news, such as "he's got the visa!!!" But I'll try to write again before that :)
posted by The Sodjis | 9:10 PM
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